You know those days…
…when you have no energy to take a shower at night, because you stayed up until 3 a.m. watching a Masterpiece Theatre mini-series, so you go to sleep promising yourself that you will take a very nice, very thorough shower in the morning, only to wake up late and then take a half-assed “body” shower thus leaving your hair without beautiful and damaging sulfates that strip it of its natural oils, thereby ending up with a gross, greasy head of hair that you have to put up in a bun because that’s the only formation that will minimize the appearance of dirt, and to compound matters you haven’t done any laundry and you are only left with the too big or too tight underwear options, and you choose too tight and you regret it for the rest of the day, and you go through the whole day like that, progressively feeling more and more like you’ve taken a bath in Crisco that NO AMOUNT of oil-absorbing rice paper can fend off, just praying that 6 o’clock will come quickly so you can leave work like a bat out of hell and drive to the nearest self-serve car wash and strap yourself to the top of your car and soak in the wonderful soap and water so that you might remember what it feels like to be clean once again?
TODAY WAS ONE OF THOSE DAYS.
